what's in a hero?

hero. noun.
1. a man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities.
2. a person who, in the opinion of others, has heroic qualities or has performed a heroic act and is regarded as a model or ideal.


3. a betrayer?



for year after year, i looked up to you.
took your every word as though it were the gospel.
followed your example.
i wished i could be you.

i gave you my best toys, the best pokemon cards i possessed, i let you take extra long turns on the go-cart.
i kept your secrets and let you tell me scary stories even though they made me cry.


i gave you every piece of my heart, trusting you'd be the only boy who wouldn't hurt it.
because heroes don't hurt the ones they love.
heroes don't hurt their most beloved little sisters.


but you DID.
you've hurt me so badly.
i don't know why you had it in your mind that destructing our family was okay!
IT WASN'T.

NORMAL families aren't like this.
NORMAL families have christmas pictures with everyone in it.
NORMAL families spend holidays and birthdays together.
NORMAL families are there to support each other when it all goes wrong.
NORMAL families are there to witness all your proudest moments.

HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME, HERE, ALONE WITHOUT A SECOND GLANCE?!
did you even care about what you were doing, care about what you were leaving behind?



DID YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT ME?
did you even worry for a second what this would do to me, to us?



i don't even know where my hero lives.
i don't even know the person my hero loves.
i don't even know what my hero does for his job.
i don't even know when i'll see my hero again, if i'll see him again.

i don't even know if he was much of a hero to start with.